Before you think I am here to judge you if you have watched it, I have read the book and many others too from the author. Let me just say, if you love the romantic and sensual vibe of the show, the book is wayyy better. I am a reader and in my younger years; they have not always been on the spiritual side, rather, they never were. Hunger Games, Twilight, romance stories my friends wrote, and so many others I found online kept me quite occupied. I get it, romance series, movies, books, gif, memes all of them are captivating. Especially for a teenager or young adult who longs to experience it themselves, it’s tasting the rainbows without eating the skittles. So this is what I would say to my younger self before I read, “The Duke and I.”
No one prepared you for this, these surprising years of sexual curiosity. No one told you, your feelings were natural, that you weren’t dirty if you found boys attractive. I know you see others in relationships. They usually won’t end well. You might even feel that you are missing out, but the boys will be too immature to give you the love you desire. You are immature to fully appreciate the beauty of the dance between the sexes. You might think you get to experience love without actually having it by reading this book but as you will look back on those moments and say they didn’t satisfy, no, they awakened a greater thirst for what was natural yet wrong in the present situation. It wasn’t love that was awoken, it was lust. Untamed passions that clawed for satisfaction now.
When you grow older, these images and ideals will scar you deeper than you expected. When you learn that in the end, your heart was searching not merely for romantic love but to be found, to be seen, to be fully accepted. As you grow older, you will be fully known and loved, but the memories etched in your mind will make your heart wander over and over again. Trying to grasp that which is fleeting. Because it seems easy. Easy to hide in, easy to settle for, because it is familiar. It holds no eternal weight. You will find it empty, EVERYTIME. You will have to pray for God to fix your thoughts, to heal your perceptions and reign in your urges. You will beg Him not to want to read it anymore, to free you from your presumptuous behavior, to awaken your limping conscience.
Love between a man and a woman is beautiful. But that’s that not the only way to experience love. It’s odd in that you will find it many unexpected places. You will learn intimacy doesn’t need to come from sensual caresses. You will learn not to wait on a relationship, that joy, peace, adventure, connections, don’t need to be put on hold, but right then, as a whole person, you are free to experience it fully. I hope you learn contentment and fight these days that would rob you of freedom. Stay anchored to a godly community. Even if your time before this moment is stained, God has accounted for it in His story. You will have a beautiful life wherever He takes you.
N.B. Error in name during recording is that of the author, not the narrator.