Sex is not the Ultimate – Day 4

Audio: Claire Walker
 Psalm 107:9 ‘For God satisfies the longing soul and fills the hungry soul with goodness’. 

Some would say that sex at times is overrated. Though in culture many will disagree that it is overrated in one breath. They often times agree that sex is not the ultimate, the oxymoron is too great to trust. This is the secular way of thinking…yet not two stones shy from the sexual philosophical views of the Church – The Body of Christ. Does the Church anticipate similar things? Do we not think sex relinquishes all sexual lusts and desires? Can we agree like the famous actor – Tom Cruise, that sex eradicates all confusions? Does it really? Is sex the answer, the long-awaiting antidote, or after receiving it, do we still yearn either for more or something more satisfying? And if we yearn for something more fulfilling then sex is truly not the ultimate.

King Solomon in all his wealth and glory and explorations and privileges, said it was all for naught and the result led only to vanity and vexation of spirit. Biblical records showed he had loved many different versions of women. So much so that he got for himself, seven hundred (700) wives and three hundred (300) concubines [I Kings 11: 1 and 3]. He, like most persons, had an insatiable desire for sex. Was it the answer to spiritual quests in his life? Was he content after? It doesn’t seem so. He said he saw it all, but it was all in vain and only made him angry and perhaps empty [Ecclesiastes 1:14]. And so, even with a thousand women, sex has proven to not be the ultimate. The converse would also be true, had it been for a woman. And yet there is still a longing in the soul, I believe Solomon pondered.

His father David did write though: ‘For God satisfies the longing soul and fills the hungry soul with goodness’, [Psalm 107:9]. So, if sex is not the ultimate, what is? What can wash away my sins? What can make me whole again? What can satisfy and make me fully clean – nothing but God’s divine and ultimate WORD. The ultimate is that which completely satisfies mind, body and soul. Our soul is from God and eternal and so can only be ultimately whole with content from above, which is from the eternal GOD.

“The importance of having a Godly discussion about Singleness”

Day 3

Audio: Claire Walker

Hosea 4:6 My people perish for a lack of knowledge. “Ignorance is no bliss” this old adage goes without saying. God through Hosea chided Israel for the corrupt and ineffective leadership of the priests. One of which is the rejection of God’s knowledge by the priest. Not only did they refrain from seeking out God’s words, but they also refused to share and adequately teach the people they are set to lead.

Hosea being God’s mouthpiece declared that the lack of information will cause the people to be destroyed. The same is true in the church today, in regards to what singleness is. There is little to no teaching about this God given gift. If the church continues to be silent then a teacher of no-good intent will do that which the priest is supposed to do.

It is important to have Godly discussions on singleness in the church arena for more reasons than one.

1. It promotes Godly awareness and consciousness to the blessings and benefits of how to develop that relationship with God, as also, awareness of what singleness really looks like and how to function effectively within the body of Christ.

2. There also needs to be a Godly highlight of the significance of being chaste. And to maintain sexual purity in its true sense. Not just to abstain from intercourse but to also be pure in mind, speech and conduct.

3. When a single person is armed with the relevant information, they will live fulfilled single lives. Thus, entering into marriage in wholeness. This will eliminate a lot of marital problems.

4. Godly discussion of singleness helps to eliminate frustration and gives the impetus to unfold the beauty found within the gift of singleness.

Let us purpose to be bold and assertive, never shying away from an opportunity to help our brothers and sisters. We help by having healthy and Godly discussions about singleness so as to raise awareness of the beauty in the gift of singleness.

Why is Singleness a gift?

Audio: Claire Walker


Christmas and birthdays are the most anticipated times in most people’s lives. This is so because of what these times come with. These seasons traditionally come bearing gifts that will be enjoyed and most times benefit the receiver. A gift is something that is not worked or paid for but rather given freely and should be freely received.

A gift is given with good intentions, such as to make the receiver filled with happiness. The giver expects the receiver to unwrap the package and indulge in the content. There is also an anticipation that the receiver will take best care of a gift that is tangible to ensure longevity. 1 Corinthians 7:7 I would that all men were as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.

The Apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthian brethren to correct some issues of marriage and singleness. He being a single man not by God’s command but by choice shared his wishful thinking with the brethren. He desired that all would be content and find great benefit in singleness as he did. But he went on to quickly declare that every man has his proper gift. What was Paul saying?

Proper gift speaks to each individual having their own special gift. Singleness is a gift, why?! because no one went and bought it or achieved it. The believer must realize that our lives are not ours and that nothing is permitted outside of God. Therefore, if one is in the state of singleness then God gave it. Colossians 1:16 For by Him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible… (to include marriage and singleness).

The latter part of the verse says “all things were created by Him for Him” so singleness is a gift given to us for the glory of God. How? Paul says in 1Corinthians 7:32 He that is unmarried careth for things of God how one should please God. Singleness was given for however long to glorify God. It is a gift that should be unwrapped and enjoyed. No gift is intended to bring misery, especially a gift coming from God. The beauty about this giver is He enables the receiver to extract the full use of the gift. We will never know the beauty of the gift of singleness unless it is unwrapped and explored.

Each man has his own special gift, God did not ask if you want it, He just gave it because omniscience knows the great benefit instore. Make a decision to start seeing singleness as the gift it is.

Defining Singleness

Audio: Claire Walker

1 Corinthians 7:7 I would that all men were as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.

According to the KJV Bible Dictionary Singleness is the state of being single, unmarried or separate from all others. It is the opposite of doubleness, complication, or multiplicity. In other words, “singleness is not having a covenanted intimate partner, call wife or husband. But is a gift that must be timely explored”.

In everyday life there are forms that we regularly encounter and need to complete for various transactions and reasons. On these forms is often the field that says “marital status” giving two options: 1. Married 2. Single. The ability to read is not widely the problem but interpretation to give the correct answer is. Why? Because culturally, though a lot of people may not be married, they are in an intimate relationship. Quite often these relationships are going for over 5 years. So, what do I choose; married or single? Their struggle to choose an option is as a result of the inability to sufficiently define and interpret their status.

The correct definition, interpretation and knowledge of singleness is not just a cultural issue but has also widely become a religious issue. May I be more specific to say “a Christian issue”, and sadly so. In order to fully appreciate anything, one must have adequate knowledge and understanding of what it is, how it functions, and also the value and benefits of the thing.

Across the arena of the church there is an unfair, socially debilitating way of looking at singleness. The concept is skewed because singleness is not taught adequately and as a result the sufficiency of understanding is not unfolded. This leaves too great a number of singles, including youth and older members, to agonize and grieve their state while failing to fully enjoy the beauty and fulfilling enrichment that singleness entails.

As Christian believers we must first acknowledge and embrace the fact that “Singleness” is a gift and the giver of this gift is God. He will not withhold any good thing from us. Therefore, we must make that conscious decision to appreciate God’s purpose and plan by trusting the process.

Prayer of confession:
Lord, forgive me for not appreciating the giver and the gift of singleness. Wash me from an agonizing, impatient and grieving state of mind in relation to my single state. Now, help me Lord to embrace the timely unfolding of the beauty and rich fulfillment of this gift. Help me also to be patient while trusting your will. In Jesus name.