What Christian Women Get Wrong About Beauty and Yes, It Matters.

You are altogether beautiful, my darling,
beautiful in every way.

Songs of Solomon 4:7 (NLT)

People who say that physical beauty doesn’t matter are in denial. Studies prove we are nicer to people we classify as beautiful and we expect they are more successful and intelligent. Not only do we admire beauty when we see it, we crave it. We pursue it, that’s why we do everything to get closer to someone we find attractive. That’s why we chase, sunsets and moon rises, discovering coral reefs and playing with a new born. We can’t really explain it but it captivates our hearts and for that moment, time cease to exist. I have a theory I am currently testing, maybe beauty is one of the gateways to the transcendent, to the ‘other world’, to the divine.

Our desire for beauty in others is not to bashed, our uniqueness calls for differential thinking and appeals. The issue with beauty in society is the idea that all of us must find one thing beautiful. That our physical bodies must all look like we came from the same factory.

If you ask a girl who thinks she’s not beautiful the first issue is, there is an ideal that she has been comparing herself to subconsciously or not. Or she is just alright to look at, but if she had this hair texture, this built, this eye, this lash, she would be 10 x more attractive. And she is right in some respect. She would be more attractive to persons who prefer those features. But incorrect if she thinks just as she is, no one loves her present physique.

The second problem she faces is seeking external validation of that beauty in the wrong. I heard so much negatives about validation that I thought it was a bad thing.  But I had been confusing it with affirmation. To validate something means to check of something is acceptable, true, worthy. God has already done that when he made you and called you ‘good.’

Affirmation however, is the action we should healthily desire from others, they would only acknowledge the intrinsic worth you already have. The beauty you already possess. But that can’t happen if you don’t believe that you are firstly worthy of love, pimples and all.

There’s a third thing we experience when we think our beauty to be small or none existent,  it’s fear. Fear that a guy won’t ever find us attractive so we will never get married. Firstly, if the standards of worldly beauty was a criteria for marriage, I have seen so many women fall short and I mean shorrtt and yet they are in a loving relationship. Because most men sincerely desire women who aren’t afraid to be themselves. Women who show up imperfect yet confident. Men love that. Besides, if God is the one in charge of your love life, best believe He’s got you covered, married or unmarried. Or can you not trust Him with that?

Have you ever met a woman that just felt like home? That had the smile that made you fill up with joy? She could even have the skinniest arms but her hugs felt the warmest? Have you ever taken notice of her grace and compassion with which she serves others and receives service? There was a word that didn’t come to your mind, but it was it all along, she was beautiful. Maybe her back bent when she walked or she didn’t have the best clothes. Maybe her home wasn’t the best. Maybe she didn’t bave the perfect body. Oh but what love you experienced!

Abiding beauty is not in a new skin care routine, a waist trainer, our butt enhancer. It’s all temporal any way. Abiding beauty is hidden in between the folds of your heart. It is how you love God, yourself, and your neighbour.  So take care of yourself, if it’s your personal goal to be healthier and a nutritionist thinks losing weight will help, do it. Or if you wish to dress nicely or take care of your blemishes do that. But may our motives never feel that when we ‘fix’ these things we will get the acceptance we desire. Your body is not merely for wandering eyes. It protects you, alerts you, keep you alive. Because you are more than your body. You are more than a standard. You walk around with eternity in your heart. Your flesh carries a unique person and the right person will notice it.

How to Have Hard Conversations About Your Feelings

Audio : Dañielle Wilson

Let us walk honestly, as in the day; 

Romans 13 : 13 (KJV)

Some of my thoughts sound crazy, like seriously, if someone would come to me with them.
I would say, listen, “You are somewhere but not reality, How in the world did you come to that conclusion?!”

But the truth is I already think them, they aren’t going anywhere unless I present myself with new evidence. Often times reading and listening only are insufficient. Because it represents an unfinished cycle. Input is usually relevant because of an output. So to overcome our anxiety we actually have to talk about it. I know, gross stuff.

I shared last time why talking is inportant, today, we will discuss how. Babies identify language by one thing only, repetition mixed with body language. Soon those coos turn into mama and dada because that’s how the parents talk to them. For some of us, difficult things were either swept under the rug, conflict turned into explosions or met with a forceful silence of avoidance.

A part of the reason we have such poor emotional skills is because no one taught us how to have the hard conversations. No one ‘cooed’ how to be vulnerable, angry but not destructive, understanding but not excusing. I am glad children go off to learn other languages at will when desired. We have the choice now to unlearn then learn effective communication. Here are a few starters:

Identify the aim of the conversation.

Is your intention invitation to just be there for you at leaast for a time, seeking advice, desiring to express an action than hurts you and why?
Get settled on the goal.

Decide on a few points you want to highlight

It doesn’t need to be mess free, it doesn’t need to follow a pattern, fam, if you have to rumble until you reach the heart of your worry, do it.
Usually there are major incidents that lead to our conclusions, start there.

Determine how best to get the message across

If you just want to update a friend on the day’s troubles and woes, a text may be just enough.
How about sharing how an experienced with someone made you anxious, hearing your voice may give insight to mood.
Have backed up unspoken things for years? In most cases I recommend face to face but be wise and choose your safety first. Don’t go alone if needs be, especially if it is a past perpitraitor, whether physically or emotionally.

Set Realistic Expectations

Sometimes just sometimes the parent that was neglectful in the past won’t turn on their heel just because you say you feel hurt.
Or maybe the ex won’t decide to take you back or develop a friendship again. Your expectation is not for them to heal you. They cannot.

Your expectation is best aligned to releasing a burden you have been pretending you havent been carryng. Or to clarify the things that cause worry.
It will hurt if they don’t respond favourably, but what if they do? What if they do actually love you and genuinely want to know to help. Things are not always as they seem. And love, you will still find your way even if they aren’t an active traveller on your journey. Sometimes we take the lessons not the people.

Talking about the real stuff is hard but it is 100% worth it.

Practical Tips:

Conversation Starters-

When you did this it made me feel like this

What happened that night painted this picture in my mind that I can’t seem to forget

When you said/ did that I believed this about myself

When I did/ said that, I didn’t forgive myself because

I put pressure on myself to do this because I think that it will lead to

Defining Masculinity

The Psychology of Masculinity (Part 1 of 2)

Audio : Dean Beezer

The psychological distinction between men and women has been informally observed for ages to be a product of an individual’s biology. Being male, automatically sets the precedence for a man’s mental wiring. Likewise, a woman’s psychological inclinations are innate; being a fact of her biological reality. The truth that men are mentally (psychologically) different from women makes the clearest statement yet, that the psychological manifestation of masculinity, by necessity, will differ from a feminine representation. How though, is this reality of the “psychological manifestation of masculinity” observed?

Dr. Nirao Shah; a Professor of Psychiatry, Behavioral Sciences and Neurobiology at Stanford University published in the Spring 2017 publication of the Stanford Medicine, findings offering overwhelming scientific support to the widely held view that “women are from Venus, men are from Mars.” Shah, published data which offered scientific justification for the view that men and women are psychologically different. In an article posted via Stanford Medicine entitled; “Two Minds; The cognitive differences between men and women,” Shah stated as the aim of his extended experimentation and research was to allow him to “zero in on sex-associated behavioral differences in mating, parenting and aggression.”

Shah argues that these sex-associated behavioural differences are “essential for survival and propagation,” adding that “They’re innate rather than learned — at least in animals — so the circuitry involved ought to be developmentally hard-wired into the brain. These circuits should differ depending on which sex you’re looking at.” At first glance, a simple mind may quickly dismiss this observation to be localized to animals. However, prior to this observation, science usually did not admit a behavioural connection between sex and preferences etc. In 1991, just a few years before Shah launched his sex-differences research, Diane Halpern, PhD, past president of the American Psychological Association, began writing the first edition of her acclaimed academic text, Sex Differences in Cognitive Abilities. She found that the ​animal-​research literature had been steadily accreting reports of sex-associated neuroanatomical (i.e., study of the nervous system) and behavioral differences.

The former president of the American Psychological Association; Dr. Diane Halpern, spent most of her life believing the lie that any observed psychological difference between a male and a female is merely a product of socialization. She, like many contemporary behavioural scientists, are now correctly of the view that our psychological masculine distinction is rooted in our biological reality. Dr. Halpern concluded, in the preface of her aforementioned work; Sex Differences in Cognitive Abilities, “At the time, it seemed clear to me that any between-sex differences in thinking abilities were due to socialization practices, artifacts and mistakes in the research, and bias and prejudice. … After reviewing a pile of journal articles that stood several feet high and numerous books and book chapters that dwarfed the stack of journal articles … I changed my mind.

What becomes immediately evident here, is that a man’s mind is intrinsically distinct from a woman’s mind. This distinction is not particularly a product of his sociological reality but entrenched in his biology and theology. There is a component of Masculinity which has to be nurtured. However, the successful nurturing of Masculinity will never be actualized without an admission and understanding of the unique NATURE of Masculinity. Remember, “Male and female CREATED He them” (Gen 5:2).

We will continue to build on the Psychology of Masculinity in part two.

Defining Masculinity

The Sociology of Masculinity

Audio : Dean Beezer

Hess, Markson and Stein (1990) defines sociology as: 1. The systematic study of human behaviour, 2. The groups to which one belongs, 3. The societies that human beings create, and within which their lives unfold. Sociology is an attempt to understand how membership in one’s social group affects individual behavior. Following from our brief review of the Biology and Theology of Masculinity, we would have learnt that 1. A man’s masculine identity is a fact of his biological reality, and 2. Masculinity is an “institution” ordained by God primarily for the purposes of headship, provision and protection. The social parameters of masculinity are essential to the development of a balanced and healthy masculine traits. Therefore, how can we observe the sociological manifestation of masculinity?

From as early as childhood, a growing boy begins to make observations of his world. Under the guidance of his parents, he is carefully instructed and directed in ways that are deemed acceptable within the social and cultural reality of primarily his parents. The child observes the behaviour of those around him and his primary influencers; such as his parents, and hence learns what will ultimately be what he accepts as socially appropriate. This essentially defines a process called socialization. This process was alluded to in the book of Proverbs ch. 22:6, which says “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” The “way that he should go,” in this context, speaks to the correct path which is supported by the Biological and Theological reality of such a child.

The process of socialization essentially prepares the boy to understand the fact of his masculinity to be linked to his biological and theological reality. The declaration in scripture which says “Male and female created he them,” sends a resounding message of a critical distinction which must be preserved. Our boys need to be socialized regarding the proper use and expression of their masculinity. No boy is born a perfect gentleman. He has to be nurtured into becoming such a man. It is often said that the “child is the father of the man” because we can gaze into the soul of a society, by observing how it socializes its children, particularly the males. The boy, as he grows, learns (ideally from his father) how to lead effectively, learns to exercise both power and restraint, learns the virtue of courage and the principle of labouring unto provision. In every culture, the expression of these important traits will be represented differently. We will explore “Masculinity in the Jamaican Society” in subsequent devotionals. If a boy learns the correct expression of manhood from his father, what do we expect to happen in the absence of his father or a consistent father figure to impart this critical lesson?

The sociological dimension to Masculinity essentially is the training of a child through socialization, to attain and exemplify consistently the following traits; Leading effectively, Exercise with Wisdom both Power and Restraint, the Virtue of Courage, respect for Women, the principles of fatherhood and the principle of Labouring unto Provision. These traits will all be explored individually in subsequent devotionals.

We will next explore “The Psychology of Masculinity.”

The Reasons You Don’t Talk- Day 3

Audio: Dañielle Wilson

“The reason we hide our faults is because of PRIDE. We want others to think we have everything UNDER CONTROL. We want to look well polished before others. The TRUTH is, whatever you can’t talk about, already has you under control.”

-Rick Warren, Defeating Temptation

My desire for these past days is to communicate that; 1) Your struggle isn’t unique 2) God understands the struggle and wants to help you through it. But there is a third component to overcoming anxiety that I have only hinted at but never addressed directly and it is the importance of others in our healing journey.

How do the best of friends or couples get to the place where they can almost always accurately guess what the other is thinking in a particular situation? I assume their encounters were more than emojis and stickers but more instances of sustained, deep and honest conversations.

I am troubled that our cries for help find their ways only on our statuses and never into a friend’s dm, or do we even have those? I suspect it’s easier to rant on Whatsapp or Instagram, we have very little accountability on those forums. After all, it has very few impacts on the day to day business of life. But authentic conversation has other hurdles too.

The real reasons we don’t talk usually falls in three categories. First, to express ourselves in absolute vulnerability would mean we’d have to return to the moment when we stopped being true to ourselves. Believe it or not, anxiety started somewhere and more than likely it wasn’t just the past few months that caused it. It may be that our people pleasing tendency is now being interrupted because we are burnt out from trying to do it all these years.

Second, talking about our worries reveals that we are in fact HUMANS, weak, fragile and in need of help. I’ve grown sad for the persons that call themselves strong just because they rose above the haters unbothered. Nah love, you need to confront the issues you had with those people and as much as physically and or emotionally possible, seek reconciliation. The hurt hasn’t gone anywhere if you haven’t healed. It has just been pushed into the subconscious that guides your decision-making process. That reeks of control. The haters still win if you don’t heal.

Thirdly, we will be held accountable for what we say. I dislike telling my friends I start to like a guy because one, they have a good memory and two, they will tease the daylight out of me but ultimately ask me the hard questions. The questions that involve A LOT thinking and praying. Most times we don’t genuinely want help, we want pity and baseless encouragement. Seeking persons who only offer comfort and no challenge to grow. We may refuse to talk because deep down we don’t want to change.

That which is hidden, imprisons and that which is uncovered, recovers. In the authority of a black belt introvert, my advice to you today is simple, talk. Talking makes sense. Talking helps you make sense of the ordeals you are facing. Talking puts the issue into perspective. Talking releases burdens. Talking invites conversation for action plans. Talking fosters intimacy with our loved ones. Talking frees us from pretense. Talking makes sense. Confess your faults one to another so that you might be healed. (James 5:16)

Be very careful who you reach out to however. Friend, a love interest is usually not the answer. Let’s stop expecting romantic love to do all our heavy lifting. Prayerfully seek out meaningful help. Can’t find anyone you trust? While I find that hard to believe there are options, for example talking to a counsellor. I fully recommend Family Life Ministries and Trauma Coach Mrs. Laylor-Bogle. Anxiety is rooted in worry, plausible sometimes but usually irrational. Talking sorts out all the chaos, talking brings healing.

Practical Tip:

Start talking, like today. Don’t delay it any longer. Be random, be unscripted. Or start making a list of the people you trust and are able to help. Schedule to speak with one at the earliest time possible.

My Utmost for His Highest – Day 3

Audio: Abigail Barrett

The godly woman gives. She gives her heart and soul to the Lord, and her life in consecration to the things of God, she gives of her time, talents and treasures to the service of others and she gives in prayer to combat the spiritual warfare that is going on. Whilst she gives, she is trading her mortality to immortality, and her corruption into incorruption, ultimately she gives her all and  receives the glory of His image.He must increase, but I must decrease” John 3:30. The truth is, for us to reflect His likeness, we have to be stripped completely of our carnal nature, this we achieve through constantly and recklessly giving to the cause of Christ.

Calvary remains the most memorable place in history and the crucifixion represents the most sacrificial act of love. To purchase man salvation it caused the man Christ Jesus His life and as we journey to become like Christ, we too will have to sacrifice our lives. The paradox of this christian journey is that we lose to gain, we give to receive, we die to live; our utmost for His highest.

Since godliness is not inherent and becoming like Christ is a process, the godly woman needs to follow the principles of the scriptures so that she can attain the image of Christ. Here is the hierarchy:

And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2nd Peter 1:5-8 KJV

As we partner with God, and indulge in this spiritual exchange we climb up the hierarchy. We are constantly growing and moving towards the goal. If there is a time in our life where there is no growth, it means we are dead, all living things grow! If we realize we are regressing we need to check our diet, what we eat or the lack thereof is of vital importance. No matter how small it is, each day we should be one step closer to becoming more and more like Christ.


When your life is based on “I don’t feel like..”, “I was born this way”, “Everyone in my family stays this way and it will be the same for me” it indicates that you have not fully surrendered or accepted the power of God’s grace.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ [that is, grafted in, joined to Him by faith in Him as Savior], he is a new creature [reborn and renewed by the Holy Spirit]; the old things [the previous moral and spiritual condition] have passed away. Behold, new things have come [because spiritual awakening brings a new life]. 2 Corinthians 5:17, Amplified Bible.

Spiritual awakening brings new life! When we have come to the understanding of who Jesus is, our way of life, our thinking and behavioural patterns are changed to align with the will of God for us. When we have experienced Christ in an intimate personal old fashioned way, Christ is revealed to us and the knowledge of who He is radically transforms who we are. Like Zacheuss you will climb any tree to see Him. Like Mary you will find Him worthy of your most precious gift and you will search for Him and when you find Him, you will pour it all out on Him. Like Paul, your only desire will be to know Him. Like James, you will be able to count it as joy when you are in the midst of adversity. Like John, you will have dreams and visions of things in the spiritual realm. Like Daniel, you will purpose in your heart not to defile yourself with the things of this world. Like Esther, if you perish, you’ll perish but your desire is to see the Lord high and lifted up. Like the 3 Hebrew boys, you will not bow! Like Moses, you will choose to suffer with the people of God than to endure the pleasures of sin for a season. Like Ruth, you will be willing to leave a life of idolatry to experience the power of God, for Israel’s God, will be your God! Oh! Time will fail to talk about all those who have recklessly abandoned their desires to pursue the will of God, those who have surrendered because they have tasted and see that the Lord is good!

Have you counted the cost for serving Jesus? Have you calculated the total of all you will have to give to gain heaven? My sisters, have you surrendered? Does Jesus have possession of all your dreams and aspirations? Is He Lord

of all the kingdoms of your heart? If He is not Lord of everything, then He is not Lord at all. Your utmost, for His highest!

Today’s Challenge: Have I counted the cost of discipleship?

Today’s Verse for Meditation:  So then, none of you can be My disciple who does not [carefully consider the cost and then for My sake] give up all his own possessions. Luke 14:33 Amplified Bible See the entire chapter 

Today’s Affirmation: I have carefully considered the cost, and I choose to be a disciple.

Womanhood Defined- Day 2

Audio : Abigail Barrett

As we seek to embrace our purpose as women, it is important for us to know that we too were created to display the image of God. As women, we reflect the image of God in ways that are distinct from men, for example Isaiah 66:13 states “As a mother comforts her child ,so will I comfort you; and you will be comforted over Jerusalem.” He created us with equal importance yet differing function.

The “help meet” 

As women, we have a subordinate function to the man. God designed the men to be the leaders, and we provide them with the tools and insights to lead effectively. They are the providers, but we are their cheerleaders encouraging and motivating them each step of the way. They are the protectors, but we are their safe place. We are the opposite that complements; we add value to their existence, all for God’s glory.

To define womanhood is really to explain the purpose of the woman, her functions, and her roles and responsibilities. What better woman can reflect this than Lemuel’s mother, the Proverbs 31 woman? I remember in courtship being encouraged to emulate the characteristics of this woman described in Proverbs 31 and thinking she must have been a superhero! How can I ever attain such diligence and excellence? While we cannot relate to every single activity there are some principles that we can take away for her lifestyle.

Let us review some attributes of a godly woman outlined in Proverbs 31: 10-31:

  1. She is rare, demanded for her Christlike character vs 10
  2. Confidential and responsible vs 11
  3. Industrious vs 13
  4. Resourceful vs 14
  5. A good housewife vs 15
  6. Investor vs 16
  7. She works hard, not slothful vs 17
  8. Consistent vs 19
  9. Giver vs 20
  10. Prepared for changes in times and seasons vs 21
  11. Uses her gifts to gain income vs 24
  12. Her work shall be rewarded vs 25
  13. Faithful and Diligent vs 27
  14. Fears the Lord vs 30

Dr. Tony Evans and Chrystal Evans Hurst in their book entitled, Kingdom Woman, explained that the Proverbs 31 woman exemplified noble qualities because she really was strong, capable, giving, resourceful, efficient and spiritually minded.

Unfortunately, if women today are striving to be all of those things at all times, they will feel like failure. In a more practical way, it may be possible to fulfill the calling of Proverbs 31, but those qualities don’t all have to be fulfilled simultaneously. Much of what is noted about this woman is what we are growing into as we become more like Christ.

Let us take this journey one step at a time, identifying our strengths and weaknesses. Let our prayer be that God will keep us humble and consistent where strong, and where we are weak, let us seek knowledge, strength and help from others who are stronger in that area. No matter where on the journey we are, we should all be grateful that we are heading in the right direction. As a godly woman, we should never feel the need to compete with a man, or any other woman. A godly woman only needs to stand and honour God with every step she takes.

My sister, don’t allow your past, inadequacies, and failures to dictate who you are. Instead, open your Bibles and let the truth of God’s words govern your thoughts and instruct your ways. You are running and one day your story will read “Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.” Proverbs 31:29. You excel them all not by being their competitor but by walking in alignment with God’s will for you.

Today’s Challenge: Does your existence define God’s purpose for creating women? Which attribute of the Proverbs 31 woman can you work on this coming week?

Today’s Verse for Meditation: She looketh well to the ways of her (household) Saviour, and eateth not the bread of idleness.(Proverbs 31:27, KJV, rewording mine)  

Today’s Affirmation: I choose to live in my calling, I choose to walk purposely and faithfully in God’s ordinance as a godly woman.

Day 2: The Human God

Audio: Dañielle Wilson

Can we follow the Savior far, who have no wound or scar?”

-Amy Carmichael, God’s Missionary

My views of who God is have been constantly challenged over the years. He has changed from the one with superhuman powers, too strict, incomprehensible, too genocidal, unfair, proud, judgmental, and then almost whiplash inducing, wham! I stand face to face with Christ. The image of the invisible God. I had a hard time reconciling the Pillar of Fire Old Testament God, to the Human God of the New.

Most of what I knew of God was secondhand information. I repeated church lingo. Like Ruth, I knew Him as their God before He became my God. That’s why the question Jesus asked his disciples in Matthew 16:15 was so important. When all the curtains are closed, when we are alone, who do we say Christ is? Is He Lord? God? Or mere flesh and bones, disintegrated and forgotten? Perhaps a figment of our imagination? A crutch humanity falls upon because we are hopelessly in need of hope? Who do you believe Christ is?

I could praise Christ’s attributes from now until eternity, but the part of Him that connects with me the most is how he walked around in flesh. Gosh! God really just came down and showed us how to be human. He is the God that bled, worked, got thirsty, felt pain, cried, needed food, was betrayed, had to ensure his breath was fresh and asked for another way out when gruesome death was near. He even got angry, turned over tables that one time. So much for the gentle Jesus, meek and mild.

When emotions threaten to consume you, and anxiety seeks to control you, look to the God who knows exactly what that feels like. Remember the Garden of Gethsemane. It would be insufficient to just have a God who understands but is no help. Christ is much more, He is enduringly triumphant. He told Thomas, “Put your finger in my scars.”

Are you bleeding from wounds? Jesus’ response is, “See my scars, touch the jagged skin, I have healed from them.” He boasts, and rightly so, “Take heart, I have overcome the world.” Expressed differently He is saying,  “Hope in me, I have the power to let you overcome too.”

Practical Tip: Write the attributes of God you have experienced for yourself. Answer, Who is Christ to you?

Defining Masculinity

The Theology of Masculinity.

Audio : Dean Beezer

“…in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them” Genesis 1:27. A fact of the incarnation of God in Christ (II Cor 5:19) is the undisputed truth that God walked the earth, robed in masculine flesh. This is significant, being that God is intentional and deliberate in his every action. Would it have mattered if God came in the likeness of a woman? The significance of the question raises the issue of God’s purpose in Christ and how manhood becomes the unique channel through which such purpose was actualized.

Speaking about the Lord Jesus, Hebrews 1:3 stated explicitly; “Who being the brightness of his glory, and the express image of his person.” II Corinthians 4:4 states; “In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.” There is a functional correlation between masculine mankind and God himself. The maleness of Jesus was an act of intentionality on God’s part. Nothing is impossible for God. The LORD could have caused a male to conceive, but he was INTENTIONAL about the preservation of the divine order established in creation. He caused a WOMAN to conceive and bring forth a MALE child. God has always been identified as the FATHER; which is an exclusively masculine role, and when he took on the FORM of humanity i.e., the flesh, he operated as a SON.

I must point out here that I am not relegating the theology of the “Image of God” merely to physical appearance. God opted to operate as the father of creation. Masculinity was the channel through which humanity became existent; recall that Eve was created from a rib removed from Adam (Genesis 2:21-23). In the same way that God is the progenitor to creation, so too is the MAN (in principle) the progenitor to the human race. Eve essentially came “out of” Adam. This decision by God to be manifested to humanity as a man is consistent with the purposes of God in completing the unfinished task of Adam. What was the task of Adam?

In Genesis 2:15, Adam is instructed to “dress and Keep” the garden of Eden. In the original language of the Old Testament (Hebrew), the word “dress” came from the Hebrew word “abad” which means generally “to work or serve.” Additionally, “keep” (Hebrew shamar) generally means “to exercise great care over” but in the context of Genesis 2, it speaks to “taking care of,” “guarding,” or “watching over.” Essentially, the role of Adam may be summarized as follows: Leader, Provider, Servant, Protector, Submissive to Authority.

Finally, the man was commissioned to worship in the form of obedience. In Genesis 2:17 we read; “But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.” The Lord God expected complete submission from Adam (omniscience does not mean that God does not have expectations of us). Adam’s failure to glorify God in the earth through OBEDIENCE and SUBMISSION, was redeemed by the Lord Jesus Christ (Luke 22:42). The Lord Jesus became an eternal template for Leadership, Provision, Protection, Service and Submission to Authority.

The Theology of Masculinity establishes the fact of a Man’s God-ordained call to exist as a competent; Leader of his family, Provider for his family, Servant to his family and Protector over the Family, while displaying Submission to the Lordship of Jesus Christ. Masculine intuition, if nurtured according to scripture, will see a MAN (whether married or single) displaying the following fundamental traits; Willingness to Commit, Courageous, Exercise of Initiative, Instinctively Protective and Respectful, Submissive to Authority and Graciously Providing.

We will next explore “The Sociology of Masculinity.”

Confessions of an Overanalyzer- Day 1

Audio: Dañielle Wilson
  • When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.
    Isaiah 43:2

I woke one night on the verge of a panic attack. It wasn’t a bad dream. My thoughts shook me awake. Endless questions, self-pity, comparison invaded my mind. I pushed them away during the days successfully. My life is busy. To rest or rather sleep, I usually listen to a sermon or music not to let my spirit feed during my shut eye hours but so my spinning mind had something to focus on. That night, I went to bed without one on. I suspect my mind couldn’t carry the worry any more. So, at 1:19 am, I thought I would lose my mind. My heart rate was faster than ever and the moderately spacious room felt so hard to breath in. No matter the affirmations I repeated, “You are not a failure” “Your calling is different” “You are doing your best.” “Pursue progress over perfection.”

I didn’t believe a word of it, so to cope with those thoughts, I did the usual. I got up and scrolled through Instagram until I tapped out at 3:20 am. I think about that morning often, even though I couldn’t feel God, He was with me. I knew too, He could calm my restless heart, I was tired. Thus began my journey to healing.

Anxiety is an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worried thoughts and physical changes like increased blood pressure according to the American Psychological Association.

Maybe you have a bad record at work, or slipped up publicly at church, or failed your courses, or got rejected by the opposite sex again, maybe your attempt to be liked by peers blew up or you battle an ongoing sickness or even concealing a secret you fear will ruin your life. All of which leads to worry and frustration.

I used to expect things to never affect my mood, that being a Christian means having a permanent VIP pass to the front seats of Unspeakable Joy. The Holy Ghost security would stop anxiety and despair (without my effort) so they can’t crash my happy concert. I appreciate now an even grander reality, one that stares down the length of days on the greatest human suffering imaginable and through the lenses of the gospel, find hope. That is what we will be fighting for these 30 Days, HOPE.

Practical tip: Express your worry, I mean the real reason why you feel uneasy. All of it. Tell it to a trusted friend/s, seek professional help, write it down, say it to God. Expect Him to hear. Expect Him to draw near. He already is.